April 2006


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20 (or so) years ago I…
1. Married the man of my dreams (at the time)
2. Had my first child, second and third child
3. Started a business

10 (or so) years ago I…
1. Attended college
2. Became more self-confident
3. Met the next man of my dreams

5 (or so) years ago I…
1. Came to terms with the end of my marriage
2. Dealt with my son and his drinking
3. Began working at my current job

3 (or so) years ago I…
1. Actually divorced my husband
2. Reconnected with my mother
3. Disconnected with my mother

1 (or so) years ago I…
1. Watched my 20 yr old son join the Marines

2. Watched my 20 year old son become a man
3. Watched my 21 year old daughter, and 20 year old son move away (empty nest syndrome)

So far this past year I…
1. Dealt with the aftermath of my exs financial mishaps which seeped into my world
2. Made a few new girlfriends
3. Understood why I have never carried any anger in regard to my ex-husband

Yesterday I…
1. Anxious about a trip
2. Downloading music
3. Walked (exercise) even though I didnt want to

Today I…
1. Walked (exercise) even though I didnt want to
2. Had lunch with a close girlfriend
3. Listened to a client and offered words of advice

Tomorrow I will…
1. Walk (exercise) even though I wont want to
2. Make sure those I love know it
3. Call my children and say I love you  – Make sure HE knows I love him and adore him

In the next year I will…
1. Lose weight, but more importantly feel better
2. Focus on my emotional health
3. Work on my relationships with friends and family

typewriter.gif   I have not been keeping record of the life and times of my rugrats as well as I should be. I use to write daily, or almost daily about the good, the bad, and the ugly in regard to my relationship with my children, as well as their personal ups and downs. I am not sure why I stopped, but I am really in need of getting back to the release one gets from words.
Week in Review – Liz:

Liz is still out of a job, but at least had an interview and Longs Drug Stores. I was really excited for her. Ok, let me be honest; the excitement was for me as well. Paying her bills is killing me. 700+ a month. I know it does not sound like an enormous amount, but it is when you have to pay it. She lost her last job in late December 2005 and since that time my money is her money. She has not been able to find a job because she became ill and was unable to hit the pavement and jobsearch. So now…now I thought great she is feeling better so job here she comes – no that was not to happen. She called last night and sounded sick, really sick. Relapse is my worst enemy right now.

As to her love life I could kick her. She is still pining over her ex who is not good for her anyway. It's complicated because her brother lives with her ex, and Liz lives with her brother's ex. There is no way to separate oneself from ex's if they live underfoot. She cries and cries "Why doesn't he like me that way anymore?" I wonder why she wants him to. He is not the same kid that she knew when they were together. He is pot smoker, dead beat cocaine using kid. She does not do any of those things. I guess you can not help who your heart is drawn to but I remind her all the time there is a choice you have about entering or maintaining a relationship with a person like that. Her stock reply "I know Mom."

Week in Review – Jeff:

Not much to report in regard to Jeff. He seems to be getting into less trouble. He has not gotten a drunk in public ticket in quite sometime, so on that front maybe he is finally tired of that hard partying life. He loves his job and is good at it. He loves the people interaction. This weekend he is off at his Marine Drill Weekend. Before he left he told me he was contemplating going active duty. I did not respond negatively. I simply said I would support any decision he made I just wanted him to be careful.

Week in Review- Jake:

A typical senior in highschool who is starting to get even more lazy about school than usual. I received a letter from the school "Your senior student is in danger of not graduating." He failed first quarter government. The one class he HAS to pass and he messing around. We talked and that is all I can really do. Extra credit here Jake comes!