On_a_clear_day_at_the_beachby_fredericomendes.jpg      So we’ve been unable to talk for days. I can’t believe Liz is actually afraid to talk to me. There have been short durations of time in the past where she has been silent but this is really the longest.

About a week ago Liz called me and informed me she was 140 dollars over drawn. Needless to say I was not pleased. She has no job, and knows the only money she has is what I put in her account, so how on earth could she be overdrawn. When I looked at her account it was clear. She went to McDonalds one day for about 10 dollars and Starbucks one day for about 3 dollars. Doesn’t sound like much, right, but it is a lot when you have nothing. Those two small purchases caused 104 dollars with of overdraft fees from the back. When I saw that I went nuts. I told her how disappointed I was in her. How she has been lazy long enough and it was time to get serious about finding a job. How she was being inconsiderate as I was attempting to keep her afloat for the past four months, and now her  brother, Jeff, as I was going to have to pay his rent this month as well (and just got done paying some of his security deposit on his new apartment). In addition, Jake is graduating and I had to find the money to ensure he got to experience it all, grad night, etc etc. Liz seemed shocked that I was so angry. I mean, come on, 104 dollars just out the window. I think I used every cuss word in the book, and continued to push the subject of her irresponsibility.  I finally told her I was so angry with her I had to go, but informed her first thing in the morning she was to call the bank and try to get some of the funds returned as I immediately put money in her account.

I was so upset when we hung up I sent her a text message:
MOM: I am disappointed, I don’t think you understand I can’t pay my stuff with your stuff and your brother’s stuff, and now this. And in one week or so both rents are due. HELP!! Fix this bank mess. I love you both a lot.

The next day…nothing

The next day…nothing

Two phone calls from me….no answer

Finally 4 days later I sent her a text message:

MOM: I called yesterday you never called me back. Did you call the bank?

Day 5:

Liz: I will. I have no minutes that is why I can’t call back. Yesterday my phone was dead and charging.

Day 6:

Liz: I called them and they are not giving the money back. So tomorrow I’m going to talk to Jeff’s friend at the bank. I’ll call you at nine and tell you details.

Day 7:

Liz: Sorry, I haven’t called you back. I knew how mad you were with me and honestly was scared to call you. I started working yesterday at IV market, training, I still have no minutes but I think I’m seeing Jeff later so I will definitely call you then. So sorry I’ve been avoiding you. Love you.

My response to her text message:

MOM: I love you too. Glad you are working. You will feel much beter about things. I was very upset as money is so right. I know you didn’t do it on purpose. You have to be more careful. So now that you are working will you still be able to take your brother to Encino at 3am and what about Jake’s graduation.

Liz’s response in txt:

Liz: I don’t work again until the 3rd of June.

Day 8…nothing, but I got a call from Jeff about Liz driving him to Encino for drill  (his two weeks). Jeff asked me to put money in Liz’s account for gas. When asked why Liz didn’t call Jeff stated he didn’t know. When asked where Liz was he said outside. I asked if she wanted to talk to me, Jeff said he didn’t know.

So basically we aren’t talking. Her mistake and she shuts me out. I guess she is going to have to come around in her own time. I am not going to baby her on this one. She has to learn that her actions touch us all.

I just sent Liz a text message stating:

MOM: I put money for gas in your account. Since you are still afraid to call I will see you when you come home. Don’t forget to bring your computer home so I can get pictures. I love you.

Kids can be so emotionally draining – even when they are adults. No matter where I go the cloud follows. Hopefully, the sun will shine soon. Jake's graduation is on Thursday and I hope Liz can get over it before then.

(for now I will just remember the lazy days on the beach with the kids…oh how simple life was back then)